Lobe and the Blame game…

So yesterday night I got a call from one of my oldest and closest friends who was on the verge of crying ( Yes! He’s a boy and yes again, boys do cry!) Lets, call him Lobe struck boy ( LSB) and then there is Her Highness ( that’s me!)

LSB:” She left me! How could she do this to me!” ( He sounded like an adorable 2 year old who had just realised that Santa wasn’t real!)

HH:” Omg! How could she do this to a wonderful person like you. She is sooo mean! Do you want me to go and beat the crap outa her? You just say the words my friend!”

Well, that was me being supportive of my friend. That’s what friends are for, right? After 10 minute long discussion on how mean and bad she was and making plans on how to set her car on fire, I knew he had calmed down by the sound of him munching on chips in the background.

HH: ” Well, you know what, I don’t think we should blame her!” ( Yup, I said it. No, I did not know her personally and now I was dead!)

LSB:” What!?”

HH:” See, people do things and make decisions according to the conditioning they have had throughout their life through various experiences. It’s not personal. In the current circumstances she did not want to accept what you had to offer to her. That’s it. It doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you or that you are going to be lonely for life!”

LSB:” But how would I know!” ( 😀 I had cornered the injured lion and now it was show time!)

HH: ” Well, that’s simple. Not easy. But simple. People themselves tell you that. You just have to believe them. For eg, a man who has a tendency to abuse his girl, generally subconsciously shows little instances of rage and aggression. That’s him showing who he really is. See it. Believe it and bail. You can’t change anyone. Changing yourself is a lifetime job. I’m sure this young lady, must have shown you subconsciously that she was just not that into you!”

LSB:” Now, when I think about it. Yea. She never responded to my calls or texts. She would hide things from me. Would pick up fights on trivial things. And was in general grumpy around me!”

HH: ” You saw it! And still voluntarily you chose to ignore it. Then, how is it her fault! You have to assume responsibility, cause when you do, you get control over your own life. And then, you can change it!”

LSB:” I think you are right!”

HH: ” Ofcourse i am . Accept it. Assume responsibility. Tell yourself it’s not personal. And let it go. And cough up 1000 bucks 😛

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