I saw this 9 month old today, looking at herself in a mirror and giggling, approaching the image trying to kiss it.
As the little one left, I saw myself in the mirror and started wondering when was the last time I kissed myself. When did I start being so unkind and careless towards myself.
I guess as we grow up we start judging ourselves according to established external standards of beauty.
Tall, dark and handsome for a guy and slim, fair, tall and beautiful for a girl.
If you trace this, it begins right from the time when a baby is born, when people comment on him/her being dark and then starts the scrubbing and rubbing of the little baby with turmeric or besan or milk and what not.
Few months back I learnt something from a book I read ,it said, ” Do not expect someone else to do something for you when you yourself can’t do it for yourself.”
It’s pretty deep. Let me explain 😉
If you can’t appreciate yourself how can you expect someone else to do it.
If you can’t make yourself happy how can you expect someone else to make you happy.
If you can’t take care of yourself how can you expect someone else to do it.
The aim isn’t to be skinny like a page 3 model or muscly like a body builder. The aim is to be the best version of yourself, to work on yourself and to love yourself.
If you look into the mirror and you don’t like it, change it.
Our parents and teachers lied to us when they said ” Treat others the way you want them to treat you.”
“Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you.”
Look at yourself with compassion. Be kind. You can’t help anyone or make anyone else happy unless you yourself are happy.
“Empty bottles can’t pour wine”.
If you are compassionate to yourself, you’ll by default start being kinder to people around you.
If you are happy, you’ll spread it around.
Take out time for yourself, self reflect but with compassion. Accept yourself and love yourself. And if there’s something that you don’t like about yourself. Change it!
But it shouldn’t be based external influences.
Most comments aren’t really thought out. They are just futile attempts by some people make to themselves feel better by pulling someone else down or just for fun ( supposedly).
In my final year of residency as my final exams approached, I gained a couple of pounds because of the constant, sitting and studying and my brain being confused between me being bored and me being hungry leading to over eating.
I had people talking behind my back that I was pregnant!!
And when I lost weight, the same people had a new theory, She’s getting anorexic. I think she’s depressed 😀
Point is, people mostly aren’t kind in assessing people. So do yourself a favour and be kind to yourself.
Criticism is good some say. Well, Oxford dictionary defines criticism as ” an expression of faults after careful and fair analysis”. So if the criticism isn’t made after careful analysis and it ain’t fair. It ain’t something you should listen to.
I had this weird psychotic obsession for muscles. 😀 I always told my mother that I’d marry a guy only if he had a 6 pack. 😀
Now, when I see myself in the mirror and see the biceps and delts pumping out along with the abs shaping up, I can’t stop kissing my mirror 😛 despite the fact that my mom keeps yelling at me that girls don’t build muscles.
I just ask her, ” Says who??” 😛 😛
If you expect someone to do something for you, make sure you can do it for yourself too 🙂